I stumbled across a New York Times article that asks a bold (and to me, slightly offensive and ageist) question: What is it About 20-Somethings?

The article ponders why adults in our age group appear to be having trouble growing up, moving out, and getting on with our lives. The author goes through an exhaustive account of scientific and sociological studies, lamenting the end of an era when kids grew up, got a stable job, had babies and eventually retired on pensions supported by the next crop of kids. We’re now getting married later, moving around more, and making fewer long-term decisions.

A century ago, psychologists determined that “adolescence” is what makes 12 to 18 year olds act irresponsible and moody. Now those psychologists are supporting ageism by claiming that us 20-somethings are in a developmental stage called “emerging adulthood,” which apparently makes us flaky, self-centered and unreliable. The article does point out that while many in my group are unemployed and living back at home, some are stable workers with steady jobs and families. However, the author never addresses the root of this divergence, debating instead how society should protect the slackers of the group without angering or alienating the more “grown up” ones.

As a 25 year-old, I’d like to present my own theory on why there’s such a divergence among my age cohort. I strongly believe that we all have goals, hopes and dreams and that we’re working diligently to achieve them.

Put yourself - if you will - in the shoes of a 20-something living in the 2000-somethings: We’ve been told since birth that if we study hard and do well in college, our lives will be set. We’ll have it made and the world will be our oyster. Yet most of us emerged from our educational career in the midst of one of the worst recessions in history. Companies stopped hiring altogether. People ready to retire lost millions in the stock market, forcing them to stay at jobs that would’ve opened up for us newcomers. Those already out of the workforce came back, using their experience to snag the few openings around. Many recent grads who managed to get hired were the first to be laid off when cutbacks began.

We’re trying. We’re really trying. But many of us are faced with a quandary: move back home and build our career with internships and “resume boosting jobs” that pay practically nothing, or wait tables in order to make rent. Generally, those who move home have made a calculated decision, weighing the long-term benefits against the short-term downfalls. Those who don’t have any parental support seem to fail or achieve success, with little discernable rhyme or reason.

We get conflicting messages, being told on one hand to build up a savings and on the other to live well while we have the chance (before all the responsibilities kick in). Our parents tell us we’ll be rewarded by working diligently with one company long-term, whereas the modern-day mentality indicates that we’ll get ahead by switching jobs frequently to build on past experience. In the field, many of us are constantly reminded that we’re the office “junior.” Older coworkers try to stick us with secretarial duties, even if our job title is Account Manager, Executive or Project Leader. Age discrimination in the workplace eventually wears on a 20-something’s enthusiasm. Our age group brings a lot of knowledge to the table – about the latest technologies, newest research and emerging trends – but most people don’t take our opinion seriously. When we try to speak up, older coworkers often seem bored, annoyed or even antagonistic. But with a growing age range in the office, it’s no wonder that ageism is dominating the workforce. We are vying for our elders’ jobs.

Also at this time in our lives, most of us are dealing with situations beyond our career. Our parents are getting older and some need our care. We’re juggling jobs, family, dating lives, and further education. A college career isn’t enough anymore, and we’re all searching for something else to bring to the table. Something that’ll make us fit in, or stand out, or fulfill whatever need that elusive employer is looking for.

So if we seem flaky and unreliable, it’s because the clear path that all those older people laid out for us has failed. We don’t want welfare and we really don’t want to be stereotyped. Us 20-somethings have an incredible desire to make it on our own and we’re eager to do whatever it takes. We’re just not sure what that is anymore.

I’ve always wanted to wanted to go on a hot air balloon ride.

So the other day, I did.

I decided not to think about my height issues until about halfway up our 4,000 foot ascent, at which point I recognized the idea that dangling in the sky from an inflated piece of cloth probably wasn’t the most logical decision. Then again, neither is jumping out of a fully-functional airplane with a limp balloon strapped to your back (but I have every intention of doing that someday, too)!

I used to be cautious. I used to carry band-aids in my purse and avoid walking over metal grates. Then, a close friend of mine was in a severe motorcycle accident. Being one of the most determined people I know, she decided to continue to ride. Which is so very like her. When we were teenagers, she got thrown off a horse and broke her collarbone, but was back in the saddle the instant the doctor took her brace off. Asked how she overcame fear after nearly losing her life, she responded logically in turn.

“Chelsea, a woman was standing in Central Park the other day posing with her baby for a photo. That moment, a tree branch snapped and landed on her, killing the child in her arms. Accidents happen. People die every day. I want to really live, fully, while I have the chance.”

It’s such an easy decision: Live Fully. We see it everywhere, saturated into the core of the American way. Seize The Day. Just Do It. Eat Pray Love. For us organized think-it-through planner types, however, it can be hard to let go. We have responsibilities. Bills. Family. Life gets in the way of living.

My own way of finding a balance with these competing priorities is list-making. I marry my need for organization with my desire to do everything right now. Prepare for the future while enjoying today. I haven’t fully developed the quintessential bucket list, but I’m getting there. I’m actively setting life goals, prioritizing, and working my way through them in a way that makes sense for me. So while going to Oktoberfest in Germany may not be in the financial forecast at the moment, riding a mechanical bull or learning to surf is totally doable and would make me really happy right now. Getting certified to scuba dive can wait, but learning to speak German can be tackled today.

What about you…do you let fear hold you back? Is there something getting in your way of living fully? What’s on your bucket list, and how do you prioritize your goals and responsibilities to live an exciting life?

Electro-man: For when you want your kids to play with power cords!

We’ve moved into a new apartment! Pictures will come shortly (it’s an absolute disaster zone at the moment in the midst of us unpacking), but we love it. It’s a two bedroom, one bath 70′s-era place much closer to downtown, so we can finally take advantage of all the fun stuff in San Diego. And the best part is that it’s near my work–no more hour-long commute for me!

There is one downfall, and we’ve actually dealt with it at every single apartment we’ve had: everything is designed for tiny people. We’re not tiny people. We’re certainly not elephants or anything, but at 5’10″ and 6’4″ respectively, Nate and I are a collective force to be reckoned with.

This showerhead clearly doesn't know who it's messing with

We’ve always had to install these fancy showerheads with extra-tall pipe extensions so Nate can wash anything above his nippular region (and yes, he just LOVES the names I make up for his body parts).

That's more like it

Furniture is a nightmare to manage. During college, we went through four futons. Four. We were too broke to afford anything better, but those little slats didn’t stand a chance against Nate’s 300 pound frame. A couple family members donated some couches to us, but those didn’t last long either. We eventually resorted to using a giant pillow on the ground in front of the TV. We’re currently on the hunt for something a little more classy (preferably something with a base of solid wood).

Mattresses have always been a headache. Those fancy posturepedic cushy things are not good mattresses for heavy people. Heavy people need a solid mattress foundation–none of this foamy stuff that inevitably squishes into a pancake. We searched high and low, and eventually ended up buying a Classic Simmons Beautyrest Alder Tight Top Firm mattress. That thing is STRONG. It’s made using one of the strongest coil gauges on the market and boasts some sort of titanium support (my eyes glaze over when salespeople start throwing out names of metal). It’s ridiculously firm, but we can always buy a separate, replaceable mattress topper if we need a little more comfort. 

When people see that “Little People, Big World” show, they clearly see the difficulties that little people face. A lot of people, however, don’t realize the difficulties that big people face. I repeatedly hit my head on the shower door overhang, and I’m not even THAT tall. We have to consider size in everything, from office chairs to utensils. Bigger people naturally eat more, so pots, pans, and even our KitchenAid stand mixers are larger than most families’. Then there’s the issue of where to put all this gigantic stuff.

I’m extremely glad we live in San Diego, where we can afford a nice place with plenty of room to live comfortably. Back in LA, we paid $1,800 a month for a tiny one-bedroom that was actually underground! I kid you not. We had a lovely view of feet slapping on concrete outside our bedroom window. And I quickly learned to understand why women pay fifty bucks a pop to have someone paint their toenails.

I love cookies…especially when I don’t have to spend hours baking them. These snickerdoodle cookies (also known as cinnamon cookies), are just like regular sugar cookies coated with cinnamon. They’re quick, super-easy, and use ingredients that you’re bound to have in your cabinets. This is my go-to recipe when I need a dessert for a potluck in a hurry.

Snickerdoodle Cookies

1 cup butter, softened
1 cup shortening
3 cups sugar
4 eggs
2 tsp vanilla
5 1/2 cups flour
4 tsp cream of tartar
2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt

Cinnamon coating:
3 Tbsp sugar
3 Tbsp cinnamon

1) Mix together butter and shortening in a large bowl. Beat in sugar, eggs and vanilla.

2) Blend flour, cream of tartar, baking soda and salt. Blend into the creamed mixture.

3) In a small bowl, blend the sugar and cinnamon for the cinnamon cookie coating.

4) Shape rounded teaspoons of dough into balls and roll into the cinnamon/sugar mixture. 

5) Bake at 400 degrees for 8-10 minutes or until lightly browned.

This is yet another recipe courtesy of my fabulous mother-in-law, Heidi. Everyone should be fortunate enough to have in-laws like mine!

Not all of my projects go quite according to plan. Some of them get slightly off-track due to creative improvisation. Some fail from a lack of expertise. And then there’s the occasional casualty of stress, annoyance or PMS. My DIY wedding card box falls into the latter category.

Overall, it wasn’t a terrible box. It was simple, just how I wanted it. The edges could have been a little smoother, but it would have served its purpose – if I hadn’t torn it into several pieces. Just after taking this picture, “PMS Chelsea” took over. Stress-addled, wedding-prepping, hormone-raging Chelsea decided that this box was a complete eyesore which could not be seen anywhere on or around the gift table at her wedding. So she did the only logical thing she could think of and yanked the fabric off in long strips, enjoying the oddly satisfying riiiiip that accompanied each tug.

The best man walked in to find me sitting in a shredded pile, maniacally muttering “Soooo much fabric…too SHINY…bunching up everywhere….so ugly!!” and he thankfully intervened. I really have to hand it to Nathaniel’s brother, he is the best best man I’ve ever seen. The box he constructed for me on his own – an elegant white one with a simple sign directing guests to put cards inside it - was absolutely perfect, and the world didn’t have to experience any more terror from CRAZY Chelsea for at least another month.

In spite of my minor meltdown over my own wedding card box, I’m posting the how-to instructions here because I think they may be helpful to someone out there looking for a simple craft. For brides with extra wedding fabric on hand, this is also an easy solution for matching your card box to your specific wedding colors.

How to Make a DIY Wedding Card Box

• You’ll need:
  • Banker’s box (or other medium-sized box or container to hold the cards)
  • Fabric big enough to go around the box
  • Packing tape
  • Box cutter
  • Glue (a glue gun works best, but craft glue will work if you let it dry between each step)

1)  Trace a square in the box lid big enough to fit a card. I made mine approximately 1.5″x8″. Use the box cutter to trim the square hole out.

2) Secure the box lid down using the packing tape.

3) Measure the fabric to the correct size by laying the fabric out flat and centering the box face-down in the middle of it. Fold the fabric up over the box on all sides and trim so that the fabric is overlapping by a couple inches on the bottom and sides of the box.

4) Glue both sides of the fabric to the bottom of the box and then wrap the box like a present, folding the excess fabric on the sides in and gluing it down as shown below.

5) Using the box cutter, carefully cut a slit along the top of the box where the rectangular hole is, angling the corners of the slit so that the fabric can fold into the box. Apply glue to to the underside of the slit flaps and glue into the box.

If I had to make mine over (but thank god I didn’t!), I think I would have been more satisfied with the results using a crisper fabric, like muslin or linen, so that the folds would be tighter and flatter than the lightweight silky material I used.

We decided to make DIY bridesmaid wedding jewelry so that each of the bridesmaids’ jewelry would be slightly different. I have a weird disdain for all things matching – I’m pretty sure it dates back to when my mom made my sister and I wear duplicate themed outfits every single holiday. All the bridesmaids’ bracelets and earrings have the same beads (ordered from Fire Mountain Gems), but each jewelry set is slightly different.

This project looks intimidating and does take a bit of time, but it’s pretty simple with just two basic beading techniques as the foundation.

How to Make Bridesmaid Jewelry

• You’ll need: 
  • Earring hooks
  • Jump loops of varying sizes (these are the metal circles that loop through each other to form a chain)
  • Bracelet clasps
  • Metal circles (for the set with the earrings sitting in metal circles)
  • Metal ovals (for the set with the earrings sitting in metal ovals)
  • Head pins (for stringing through earrings)
  • 20 gauge wire (for wire-wrapped beads)
  • Pliers (roundnose, chain nose AND needlenose pliers are helpful for precise loops, but I’ve made loops with any of the above)

1) The basic pattern of each bracelet is three interlooped jump rings (directions for opening jump rings are available at Fusion Beads), followed by a bead with a simple loop on each end. I like to use a head pin with the top trimmed off for loops, but you can also use a section of 20 gauge wire.

2) Repeat the above pattern until you reach the correct length for your bracelet, and then use a small jump loop to add a bracelet clasp to one end.

3) Earrings are all created similarly to the bracelets, with the head pin looping through the beads and onto the earring hooks.

Metal Oval variation: simply loop a metal oval through the jump loops on each end of the bead with simple loops, so that the metal oval is spanning the length of each bead as pictured.

Metal Circle Variation: place the bead through the metal circle so that the holes of the bead and metal circle line up. String the wire through the holes of the metal circle and bead, then finish the simple loops and continue the bracelet as normal.

Wire-wrapped beads: The wire-wrapped bracelet and earrings are the most difficult of the set, requiring a little trial and error with the wire and pliers. Instructions for wire-wrapped beads are available at Fusion Beads. After being wrapped, the beads are incorporated into the bracelets as normal.

Our DIY bridesmaid jewelry was a total hit at the wedding. The beads I chose were a bit chunkier than what I’d normally like, but I thought they worked really well as a bright, fun accent to the bridesmaids’ simple black dresses.

I did it. FINALLY. Six years ago I met my husband. After a year of glaring at him, three and a half years of dating and a year and a half of engagement, it’s official at last! The hard work and preparation really paid off, and everything was picture perfect. Of course, there were a number of things I shouldn’t have stressed out about: the program fans were pretty unnecessary as it was a perfect day at the top of La Jolla, and the boutonnieres and corsages I spent hours wrapping went largely unnoticed.

As with most days in my life, my wedding day did not go off without a hitch (pun totally intended. Heh, heh). Technical difficulties resulted in our processional music being  played from a stereo in our friend’s hands, High Fidelity style (that was actually pretty adorable). It also turned out that there was an error in the directions, and the signs intended to direct guests to the ceremony site…somehow…never got put up. Pulling up to the ceremony to discover that HALF my guests were lost was not so adorable. It all ended up working out, though, and I felt surprisingly calm as I walked down the aisle to “Another One Bites the Dust” (the processional was Queen-themed, and the bridesmaids all walked down to “Fat-Bottomed Girls” without the slightest tinge of annoyance). The minister – our counselor from college – announced that anyone with any objections should “shut the heck up and keep it to themselves” before launching into the best ceremony speech ever. There were some references to Dr. Seuss and (my favorite part!) he had Nathaniel promise not only to love, honor and cherish me, but also to never wash my delicates on high ever again.

I presumed that our unconventional ceremony choices would get the point across that we tossed tradition out the window long ago. Several friends were surprised to see me in a white dress and one commented that she expected me to stroll out in a pink tutu (my response: “Pink is soooo not my color!”). Alas, none of that stopped a couple of old-fashioned attendees from pointing out that I was egregiously going against a number of etiquette rules. And THEN someone fell into my photobooth and knocked it over, breaking my beloved Macbook Pro.

BUT. That is not the point. Those things weren’t the spirit of the day, they were just the stumbling blocks on our way to something fantastic. I don’t mention them to dwell or be negative, but to point out that this is just the nature of things. Every day, every life, every person faces problems that have to be overcome. Maybe it stands to reason that the greater the day – the greater the life - the bigger problems we’ll face. When I encountered the most overwhelming problem of the evening, I sat down for a minute and assessed the situation. I was frustrated as hell but quickly realized there was nothing I could do to fix it. I felt numerous eyes on me, waiting with bated breath for the bride to finally just lose it. Instead, I searched out my new husband in the gathering crowd. He was standing quietly, unphased, reaching his hand out to me. I took it, brushed off my dress, and followed him to the floor. We danced the rest of the night away.

So did everyone else.

Welcome to day three of DIY Wedding Week! Yesterday we made DIY Wedding Table Numbers, and today we’re using a lot of the same materials to make DIY wedding program fans. We decided that we didn’t want a big program booklet since we’re trying to keep everything short and sweet, and a program fan will help keep our guests cool in the middle of July. We printed our bridal party information with a short note to friends and family on the front, and used printed cardstock for the back side of the fan.

Things you’ll need:

• Assorted patterned cardstock (we found a book of wedding pattern cardstock at Michael’s)
• Cardstock in your wedding color, and a printer to print on the cardstock with (we didn’t have cardstock in our color, so we glued our turquoise wedding paper onto white cardstock)
• Paint stirrer sticks – one per guest (we asked for these at Home Depot and they gave them to us for free!)
• White paint
• Hot glue and hot glue gun (we tried adhesive spary and a glue stick, the hot lgue worked best)
• A corner rounder, if round corners are desired (Fiskars corner punchers are available at most craft stores)

1)  Paint the stirrer sticks white.

2)  Trim the colored cardstock and the patterned cardstock to 8″ by 5″.

3)  In Microsoft Word, click File>Page Settings>Paper. Change the height to 8″ and the width to 5″. Type the names of your bridal party along with whatever message you want to appear on the fan. Print this onto the wedding-colored cardstock.

3)  Lay the patterned piece of cardstock face-down on a table, apply hot glue to a paint stirrer stick, and glue the stick to the cardstock.

4) Apply hot glue around the edge of the cardstock, and lay your program cardstock piece down to complete the fan.

That’s it! I put ours in a basket for the ushers to hold (or set on a table, because all of the fans together is actually pretty heavy).

Welcome to day two of DIY Wedding Week! We’re starting off easy today with DIY table numbers. You may remember seeing similar photo table numbers in our post about Amanda and Ken’s wedding. We absolutely fell in love with the idea at their reception, so we hijacked it for our own day!

For these, you will need:

• Childhood photos of you and your fiance from ages 1 through however many tables you have – 4″ x 6″ (we had 15 tables, so we have one photo of each of us at ages 1 through 15)
• Black cardstock – 8.5″ x 11″
• White cardstock – 8.5″ x 11″
• Paper in your wedding color (and a printer to print on the paper)
• Scissors
• Ruler
• Glue stick
• Edge rounder, if you want your edges to be round (Fiskars hand punches that round edges are available at most craft stores)
• Number stands/photo stand clips to hold the completed number (available at party supply and dollar stores, or you can simply cut a slit in a cork for a solid base, or bend floral wire into a clip shape)

1)  Using a large, simple font set to “Outline” style in Microsoft Word, type out two of each of your table numbers and print onto the colored paper. (We have 15 tables, so we typed out the numbers 1 through 15 two times each). Cut out each number and set aside.

Look at how hot my fiance is! Is it weird that I'm checking out a 15 year-old?

2)  Trim the white cardstock pieces to 8.5″ x 5.5″. Round the corners using the corner punch, if desired.

3)  Trim each childhood photo to a maximum width of 4.5″ and a maximum height of 5.5″. Cut black cardstock pieces to fit each photo so that there is a 1/4″ black border around each photo (I do this by setting the photo in the corner of the cardstock piece and then measuring 1/2″ inch on the top and bottom). Glue each photo to the corresponding black mount.

4)  Center your age 1 mounted photo onto a piece of white cardstock. Arrange your cut out number 1 in the upper right-hand corner, overlapping the photo and the cardstock. Glue down the mounted photo and the number. Glue the other number 1 and your fiance’s corresponding photo at the same age on the other side of the same piece of white cardstock.

5)  Repeat step 4 for each remaining age/table number.

DIY photo table numbers are a great way to incorporate a bit of “you” into your wedding, and gives guests something to look at and talk about throughout the night.